The Danger of the Fork!:

There was a man named Paul who loved his fork. He brought it with him everywhere he went. ‘You never could be too careful’, Paul would spittle. ‘Never know when you run out of food’. Most people, would leave their forks at home these days. It was considered mildly offsetting. Many considered it akin to walking about the streets with no clothing on. So, you might be able to say that Paul was considered a little weird for his society. Many people in his home country tried to coax him, saying that forks were dangerous and that people could get hurt if he were to misuse it. They would tell him that the fork could get into the wrong hands and even if he didn’t intend to hurt anyone, someone could get hurt, with his fork. But Paul knew the truth. Paul knew a fork was only a tool. Paul was a studious man and was always in the town library. Paul knew that even though public perception about forks had gone downhill over the years, the country’s charter was never changed. The law of the land not only permitted forks to be present at any function social gathering or in public, it actually made a point in the charter of this land that everyone had the right to eat wherever they so pleased, and thus, having the right to eat, wherever they pleased, they also had the right to cutlery possession.

Paul, himself had gotten the idea to carry about his fork on his person when in an ancient politics course, where there was mention of something called ‘the charter’. Now this document known as the charter was an ancient and archaic piece of literature that strove to offer protection and rights to the citizens of the country. It sought to protect its citizens and grant them the right to protect themselves. But everyone knew that that document was written in a dead language. We live in enlightened times. There was a small, though growing group of people who had attached to Paul’s idea of carrying his fork around with him everywhere he went. This small group of people slowly burgeoned into a sizable portion of the population. As fork possession became more popular, as also did citizens of the country become more and more knowledgeable on issues of this charter. 

Paul was different. Paul was very knowledgeable of this document, which seemed to have become lost in the annals of time and memory to all others in the country. And while popularity of fork use was increasing, also did they who sought to suppress fork use. They, those in charge of the country, spent trillions of pesos into the channels through which public opinion could be swayed. 

Especially since ‘the great discourse of social accountability, utensil prohibition and disdain of cutlery’ of a century earlier. During this period of academic upheaval, fork use en mass was prohibited. There was in fact, a period of about a month where the soldiers of this great country visited door to door in order to confiscate the public’s forks. Some put up a fight, claiming right on a document known as the charter, an ancient and archaic piece of writing that strove to offer protection and rights to the citizens of the country. That document was written in a dead language. We live in enlightened times. To say the least, these brave souls were punished on site. They were punished terribly by manner of ‘can opener’. 

A popular place to get information about what was happening in the world in these days was through a little box, government mandated to each home, called a televox. The man on the screen, whose constant presence was grating although, albeit comforting, spoke of different subject matters lately.

And as so often is the case, in cases of suppression, all instance of the suppression slipped past everyone’s memory. The charter was never amended to exclude citizens from fork possession. It was simply assumed that they had all been confiscated.